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Monthly Archives: April 2019
Here lies a square spade shovelThat could quickly dispose of youIf I could get a good enough swing for momentum Or maybe this wine bottleRecently emptied by yours trulyWould do the trick with more grace I always thought poison would be the way to goBut to get you drunk enough to take itTakes too long Of course a bullet would be the fastest and easiestBut it’s too cold hearted and detachedTo suit me My favoriteIs the hands-on murderI don’t hire a manOr sabotage your truckOr even consult a Voodoo Priestess No. I fantasize about grabbing you by the throatWhen you lean in to try to kiss me goodbye- what would your girlfriend say about that, I wonder-And sinking a butcher knife into your neckAnd watch your eyes widenWith recognitionAs you realize I hate youAs much as I ever loved you.And forgiveness will not come from me…
This is it. The end. And I just found out I’ve been doing it wrong all along. Today’s challenge I saved for last. That’s a lie. I put it off till last. Because I didn’t “have time”. I should have started with it, and used it as a guide the whole way. But no. I thought I knew best. What a joke. As a reader, I am constantly finding things I want to read and people are relentless in their recommendations to me. As I am to them. And I appreciate it! I have found many great reads from the persuasion of others. But what with book club, and books I have had on loan through READS for eons, plus the ones I continue to buy and pile up, I am inundated with material. So when I asked my Aunt Brenda what to pray for and what to fast in her honor, and she said, “I want you to read the book of Matthew,” I will admit, I swallowed hard and immediately began thinking, “well, I’ve got plenty of time to get to it.” And here I am, on the last day, middle of the afternoon, a full six Lent writings behind, and only in the eighth chapter of 28. The reading isn’t hard, and it is quite enlightening, the stories familiar and comforting, but I don’t think I’…
Last week was Library Appreciation Week. I only posted one thing about it, but I think I post often enough so everybody knows where I stand on libraries. In case you recently crawled out from under a lettuce leaf, know that I LOVE them. I don’t know that I can adequately put into words what the library means to me. But I’m gonna try my best. Even though I’m more than a week late. I’m always late. And before I forget, that cover pic was taken by Liz Ballard, who truly has a history with our local library. I didn’t ask for permission, but I don’t think she’ll mind. I have served on the local library board for several years now, and it looks like I’m going off next month to serve on the Regional Board. Anyway, that’s the least of my love. QUITE literally. Board meetings are typically endured, not always enjoyed. Even though they try to make it cool. Here’s our meeting room: But that’s part of adulting. The good news is, it allows me to know what events are coming up before anybody else 😀 I have a lifespan of memories at the library. It brought tears to my eyes when I was asked to serve. My mind flashed back to all the times I’d walked through the door, clutching my satchel, ready to…
Some of you who follow closely are probably confused. First of all, there are technically 40 days of Lent observed. But there at the start, I didn’t take off Sundays, so I’m gonna wind up with 44 days by the time Easter gets here. Also, my last post is day 35. Where did the other days go? Well, sometimes you gotta prioritize. And yesterday, something traumatic happened in our little town, and it bears a blog post. Today was going to be for Paris, and the crippling shock of the loss of Notre Dame. It was truly a marvel. And when something stands the test of time and wars for eight centuries you think it will be around forever. But one spark….just one spark and all the history and beauty will crumble. I can only imagine how paralyzed Parisians feel. And were they scared, too? Did they think it was another terrorist attack? Thank God it wasn’t. And I haven’t heard of any casualties, but I haven’t researched it, either. Today is Wednesday, April 17th. Yesterday, I was sitting at the office with my DC and Engineer when a bunch of sirens cut loose and blasted down the road. They were going so fast I swear the building rocked. Which, in itself, is not unusual. They’re always in a hurry going somewhere. Lots of emergencies in this town. Although from my experience it tends to be…
~Wednesday April 10th A long time ago, this lady would come in the Co-op once a week and buy birdseed. She was always friendly but did not loiter. She just got the items on her list and away she went. One day, I inquired after a gentleman that I frequently waited on that worked for the same outfit she did. I hadn’t seen him in awhile, and frankly, I was worried about him. (He was a little gruff, but I like to think I had worn him down some with my cheerful and slightly sarcastic demeanor). That got us to talking. Turns out, we had a lot in common. The more we talked, the more we wanted to talk. She increased her visits to twice a week so we had more chat time. We swapped recipes. We quoted movies. We conversed about mutual acquaintances. It wasn’t long before our talks could no longer be contained to 45 minute segments at the counter & we made plans for an afternoon of floating on the lake. Most of y‘all know I like to be neck deep in water. I don’t even mind fish nibbling at me (although those in the gulf DID get a little aggressive). But Tammy Lynn is convinced that alligators and bull sharks exist in Douglas Lake and they will attack, lest she stay hyper aware. At one point during the afternoon, a sizable fish decided that I was a…
I’m that girl.The one that still prefers to be called “girl”Although clearly it would be totally appropriateTo address me as ma’amI’m still holding on to the pastWith my dyed hairAnd my funky jewelryAnd the bright clothesI still want to be That GirlWho drinks beer on patiosAnd rides with the top downAnd Guns-n-Roses blaringI want to be noticedAnd appreciatedAs ME.I am That GirlWho still can’t do sums in her headAnd doesn’t hesitate to order dessert And happily abandons responsibilites in favor of a good bookI’m the girl who will exercise by throwing a ball for her dogOr swimming in the lakeOr meandering up the mountain just to eat a bag of Chex Mix at a waterfallI don’t want to hurry I want to LOOKAnd SEEAnd DOAll the things I’m not supposed to have time forI’m That GirlWho doesn’t like crowdsWho would rather stay homeAnd eat Chinese on china platesIn front of the TVThan some fine dining establishment where you feel obligated to tip 30% Even though service was less than mediocreAnd your baked potato was coldAnd your salad was warmI’m That GirlWho cries at the National AnthemWho believes in working for what you getWho wants to know how you feel about LIFEI’m That Girl behind the keysBehind the wordsBehind the times…
~Tuesday, April 9th. I’m beginning to run out of things to give up. Especially now that I’m praying for groups of people, so I have no specific requests from individuals who know how to really get under my skin with stuff. (Looking at you, Jena, who made me leave my jewelry at home!) Lent’s not supposed to be easy, though, so I picked something today that I would miss dearly, because my prayers are encompassing. I will do without Google. Yes, I use it all the time at work. I check out the weather. I shop for things I don’t need, but think I do. I use it to look up popular restaurants. Then I use it to find the good restaurants. Yes, I use it even more for song lyrics. Yes, I USE IT FOR EVERYTHING. JUST LIKE YOU DO. And it got me to thinking. Everything I need to know can be found within seconds. And I really depend on it. And I absolutely take it for granted. It is so frustrating when I run out of data, or the internet is down, or I’m in no man’s land and it takes more than ten seconds for a search to come up. But what did the farmers do? What do many of them still do? A long long time ago, before everybody had a cell phone in their pocket, we had a tiny, heavy computer at…
I want to drive on roads with no traffic. And if I do pass someone, I want them to wave out the open window of their pickup truck. I want to be able to apply eyeliner like a pro, not like a left handed raccoon. I want to be able to do all the yoga without quivering. I want to live in an old house in an old city on the ocean with a widow’s walk, though I am no widow. Although I sometimes feel like one. I want to always work at an honest job. I want to keep the one I have. I want to grow things and tend to them with my hands. Tomatoes, aloe, squash. Lilies. Okra. I want to sleep without dreaming. I want to listen to good music and lay in the grass and watch the clouds and hunt for four-leaf clovers all afternoon and not wear shoes at all. I want people to adore my accent, always. I want to be called Amelia by people who love me. I want to go on a trip and not come back until I feel rested and healed. I want to eat cupcakes every day. I want to ride fast horses and read good books and have the softest bath towels in three counties. I want my glasses to stay put. I want to admire trees the rest of my days, and listen to wind chimes and not the honking of cars. I…
I met her at the library, so I knew instantly she was good people. She looked like a mom, but turns out I was wrong about that. She looked like she knew about life, and I was right about that. We have gone on to be cohorts in crime, obsessive texters, and foodies from the get-go. We share book recommendations and pretty much the same taste in music. She does listen to a podcast about small town murders that I haven’t been able to enjoy on the same level. It’s pretty grim, Karen. 😐 We challenge each other to spin more, drink less, and not be assholes. We are known as sloth & honey badger. Baker is gazelle. We tell terrible (politically incorrect and inappropriate) jokes, modify our yoga poses, and share a common interest in dogs, cupcakes, and men. Probably in that order. I’m a problem creator~…well, that’s not precisely true. Problems gravitate to me and I think they’ll go away but they only get worse and then I have to ask Beth for advice and she just calmly untangles the whole mess and folds it up and places it in a Rubbermaid box. With a label. And an expiration date. She’s an accountant. I’m an artist, per se. She’s the closest person I’ve got to a ride or die, because Lisa has kids and lives two hours away…
Today, my prayers are for the lost. I should have made this day one. They’re the most important. Their time is truly limited. I can’t wrap my mind around not believing. It’s like, #1) are we here by accident? Then how did we get here? Ok, if you don’t believe God put us here because you can’t understand that, so you understand the science that some people believe in? I’d much rather just think we were created by a higher form. And that he created the Heavens and universe too. I can’t begin to wrap my head around the Big Bang Theory. Believing in the Lord is easy. And if you’re one of those people who look for signs, I am certain you can find plenty. Just like there is beauty in everything, there is God in everything. Because he created it. And #2) You have nothing to lose. Nobody should think you’re weird for professing a faith. If they do, they’re not very open minded, and does that really line up with everything else they say they believe in? I don’t think so. Just believe! I promise it’s a better life. It’s like having someone forever on your side, forever and always. Romans 8:31 tells us that! What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us…
