Thoughts I have while walking on treadmill: 

I should have four miles in about an hour. I can do this. 

Lalalalala…

Should have brought my radio. 

This would be a perfect opportunity for listening to an audio book. 

Wonder if I could read a REAL book without falling off? 

Nah. 

*Close my eyes & try to envision how it would go*

Immediately trip. 

Regain balance. 

Wow, the ceiling is really low down here.

Wonder what those nails are from? 

Good thing I’m not tall, I’d be claustrophobic. Guess God knows what he’s doing. 

These dogs stink. 

I can’t believe Johnny used to let dogs live in his house. Look at all the dust they generate! Why does he like it down here so much? It’s so drab. 

Probably because I talk so much.

And he can watch what he wants to on TV. (Platoon infinity)  

How do I turn that TV on, anyway? {It’s a big screen that’s probably as old as I am}

Can I Facebook while walking? 

*Try it* 

*Become slightly nauseated*

Nope. 

Sigh. 

How far have I walked? Not even a thousand steps?!? Bull crap! 

Maybe I could do Instagram. Less reading. 

Okay. 

Okay. 

Okay. 

Hmm. I’m getting kinda hungry. All I’ve had is coffee. 

I should take a break. How long have I been down here? Probably 30 minutes. 

Try ten. Good grief. 

I couldn’t do this in a gym. 

At least I can look out at the snow. 

…..

Maybe I could do this in an airport where I could people watch. 

Now there’s an idea! Have a few treadmills at every gate for layovers. 

Except I don’t fly enough to get exercise.

If I COULD fly, I wouldn’t need a treadmill.

I wonder what fish do for exercise? Like, catfish. Trout are sleek. 

Birds aren’t fat. Except chickens. Chickens are fat. 

….

OK, I’ll walk until the clothes finish in the washing machine. 

Our dogs are FAT. 

I’M FAT, that’s why I’m on this thing. 

It’s hot down here. 

I could be reading. 

I could be watching Friends. 

I could be eating eggs & avocados. 

OK, just 4,000 more steps. 

If I were a queen, I could have my jesters come through & entertain me.

Pssh. If I were a queen, I wouldn’t do squat. 

I gotta tinkle. 

I’ll quit long enough to make breakfast. Then I’ll come right back down here.