A few days ago a friend posted about being at the vet’s office with her pet. In the waiting room, there was another lady with her pet…and three unruly children. She had shushed them several times as they made a ruckus & eventually took them out to her vehicle to watch a movie while they waited on results . Essentially, bribing them to be good for the duration of the visit, & rewarding them for their already abysmal behavior. These children were reportedly of an age to know how to act. When the vet had to go outside & summon them, the noise from inside the room where they gathered was loud, as the mother continued to shush them to no avail, while she tried to speak with the vet about their dog or whatever. The friend ended by saying she knows what would have happened to her if she’d acted this way- a busted hind end. Same here.

The comments on this post were immediate. Mothers weighed in saying they sympathized with the woman having to wrestle with three little ones & a dog in a strange environment. Another said for important chores she enlisted a baby sitter for them.

Well. Here’s my theory. And I know my opinion doesn’t matter, because I have no children. But before you get all huffy, hear me out.

Children are spoiled.

When I was little (and yes, there was only one of me), a trip out ANYWHERE was a treat. It was nice to get out of the house. I wasn’t carted here there & yonder every day of the week for enriching activities. I had to make do with keeping busy in the yard, or my room. It wasn’t my momma’s responsibility to make sure that my every want was met, just my needs. If I wanted to go to the zoo, I had to wait. Had to wait on a special occasion, like a birthday, so we would have a little extra money. The park? Did we even have parks back then? You just went outside & built a fort from sticks & an old tarp & hunkered down with Harriet the Spy. Trip out for Froyo? Good luck with that. Suck on a packaged icee stick that cut your mouth with that sharp plastic. Maybe, if I could catch someone in a generous mood, they’d put a banana in the blender with some vanilla ice cream. If we had a foray to the drugstore, grocery store, shoe store, wherever, & I acted out, punishment was swift. I was whipped right then & there, or soon after arriving home. And I didn’t get to go next time. Whatever special things we had planned were stripped until further notice.

My point is, think of the women in past generations. They had several children, and they certainly didn’t have a reward system for bad behavior. So what if your kids are in a bad mood? It’s not about them. It’s about getting groceries for the next week. It’s about getting new clothes since you’re outgrowing everything. It’s a PRIVILEGE to be out in public. Look around. You are in a different environment. Promote your children to ask questions about the strange products they see, to quit pestering their siblings.

Yes, this is easy for me to say, because I don’t have any. But I also don’t want any. Not because I’m afraid I’ll be a failure & hafta eat my words, either.

Because my kids would be judged, mocked, & ridiculed because they still get spanked, told no to nearly everything, & have to read two hours for every hour spent with an electronic device. I wouldn’t be fair. They wouldn’t be treated like kings & queens, they’d be treated like  little hostages, wearing what I told them to, eating what is placed in front of them, & being quiet.

And I’d probably be locked up for it.

Also, I am aware that there are special situations. Kids don’t feel well, but for emergencies you have to take them out. I get it.

In rare instances, kids have autism. I do not recognize ADD. In horses that can’t pay attention, you lunge till they wear the edge off before climbing aboard for a six hour trail ride or hour lesson to calm them down. Maybe those type of kids need less sugar & more activities. I see this behavior in my line of work, too, & I refuse to talk over someone’s bratty kid. I will just stand there smiling politely (looking a bit strained, I’m sure) until the parent takes control & we can speak in normal tones. This has never been a problem. And no, a crying baby doesn’t count. They really can’t help it. And that’s a whole ‘nother post.

I don’t understand why parents think in order to give their kids a better life than what they had, they have to submit & cater to their child’s every whim.

And what was so bad about our childhood, really? What did it matter to not have a matching pair of shoes for every outfit? What was so bad about waiting for the latest video game to go on sale, or not getting it till Christmas or your birthday? I guess I’m just mad. Look at the world. Are parents teaching them about soldiers overseas, separated from their kids to keep the rest of us safe? Are they teaching them about the biggest sacrifice ever, Jesus Christ? Or are they just letting them believe that they will always pick up the pieces when the kid makes one bad decision after another.

Sorry, I know I’m preachin’ to the choir.

I would be less embarrased to have someone witness me giving a spanking that they dissaproved of than someone witness my kids acting like uncivilized monkeys.