I talked to two farmers today who were having good days. One had just shot a coyote.“Well, that’s good!” I cheered.“But there were two more with him,” he amended. “Oh. Well, maybe you got the patriarch and they’ll leave.” The other farmer said, “I got up this morning and my cows weren’t out, and that’s always a good thing.”I didn’t disagree. I have to tell myself to live in the moment. Pretend I’m a dog or something. If you had told me 20 years ago that I’d be working for the government in a job I loved and driving a Maxima, I would probably think I had a pretty great life. Especially if you’d told me I was on a four hour road trip, alone, to see my friend in Kentucky. But the truth of the matter is, I couldn’t go where I really wanted to go (Ireland) with who I really wanted to go with. I no longer speak to my best friend. My favorite person in the world is no longer in my life. And my coworker is disgusting.Life hurts.But, I’m in pretty good health, I have lots of friends who care very much about me, I have my own home and a precious 80# dog.So, you take what you got and grin and…

It’s not that I have nothing to write about (which I don’t) but it’s that I really just don’t want to. Like, no part of me has any desire to write a word. So I won’t. For now. I wanna go crawl in a hole and eat ice cream and not talk to anybody. Finally working on this a week and a half later: Today was a taxing, aggravating day at work. Thankfully these are few and far between, but when they do come around, it’s almost like the aggravation is amplified because it’s so out of character. Addison wanted me to gather up all the folders needing signatures. We’ve got a QAR in January and he’s crossing his t’s and dotting his i’s. {I felt like those should be capitalized to look right, but when I did, it wasn’t illustrated as clearly, so that’s why they’re in lowercase, although I’m unhappy with the appearance and I don’t know which is correct and I’m not going to bother googling because this is my blog and I can do as I wish). Anyway, I stopped pulling folders when I got to 20, thoroughly disgusted and baffled. The rain wasn’t helping a thing, either. Although I should be grateful my job is inside with my own personal heater (thank you, Charlie…

Today, I am filled with a sense of rightness I haven’t possessed in some time. I’m afraid to move too fast, I don’t want to disrupt this balance. I’ve been busy, is that it? The printer, which was not scheduled until next Tuesday, made it’s appearance today. I wasn’t surprised, in actuality, but rather, was glad to be getting it over with, even if I was in the middle of breakfast. The guy delivering it was congenial and easy going, which is always a blessing. He actually accepted the proffered bottle of water, which is so unusual I was momentarily stunned. What was funny was I went to sign for it, and he said he delivered one to Bowling Green not long ago. He got it all placed and plugged in and offered the sig pad to the guy working. Dude backed up and was like, “I’m not signing for that,” all wide-eyed. Truck driver was like, “Oh yeah you are,” and he says, “I’m not authorized” and delivery dude was like, “Well, I’ve gotta load it back up, then,” and the NRCS guy was like, “Oh hold on here, you can’t do that!” and the driver was like, “Hide and watch, buckaroo.” So long story short, the “unauthorized” employee signed and they got to…

As Fish said, the Tuesday that feels like Monday. I hope I don’t miss something important this week, since I’m already running a day behind. I’m also two days behind on the blog. Maybe I can get that remedied, at least. (Um. It’s the following Wednesday when I’ve come back to this and I am SOOOOOO behind)(Now it’s the 23rd and I’m so desperate I’ve resorted to my home laptop which I almost never use). I hate when I’m dreading doing something, but it has to be done, so I do it, and doing it makes me feel even worse. Life would be an easier pill to swallow if we weren’t conditioned to have hope in the face of all adversity. If we could just say, “Listen, this is gonna suck, but it has to be done. So don’t go telling yourself that it’ll be ok. ‘Cause it won’t. The best you can hope for is getting put out of your misery quickly. A ripping of the proverbial Bandaid.” But noooo. In order to get ourselves through whatever it is, we lie to ourselves: “Oh, it won’t be as bad as you think.” {Yes, it will}. “They might tell you this or that.” {No, they won’t}. “You might get a cookie…

Veteran’s Day. In years past, I’ve elaborated at length about my appreciation to those who have served. I should again today, but there are more pressing concerns in my midst, and I don’t have anything new to say, so simply: Thank you for your service, no matter your reasons. I had promised JA to accompany him to Powell to look at a bus. Let me stop myself right there. Not a bus, as in a school bus. More like a tour bus. I don’t know why this set doesn’t call them a motorhome, but I understand that the correct terminology is either “coach” or “bus”. Perhaps this is to differentiate from the Class A and Class B rating in an effort to sound a little more recognizable. My friend from college, her parents kept one, and they called theirs the same thing: “the bus”. They are anything BUT a bus, they’re a house on wheels. And the ones I’ve spent time in are not like a mobile home, they have high quality cabinetry and solid (often heated) floors. Most people don’t have a clue when you say “bus” what you’re actually talking about.So it turned out the bus wasn’t in Powell; it was in Maynardville. No big deal, I was just along for the ride. But the best part was, he…

I was idly wondering what subject I would expound upon tonight. Today’s WordPress prompt was: “What is good about having a pet?” Well, I talk about the benefits of that ad nauseam, so I was going to have to look at Pinterest for inspiration again. But then… well, you’ll see. Today was my first day “off” since Halloween. I’m not counting yesterday since I had laundry to catch up on, plus the added task of furniture cleaning and what have you. So I’ve been here, basking in a day of no real responsibilities, apart from feeding myself. And I already had my meals for the day worked out: I planned to fix chili since it was going to be so gloomy. I used to love rainy days. Now I dread them like a trip to the dentist. I had thawed my sirloin tips and hamburger meat and after I got breakfast eaten and washed up, I decided to get on with it. I browned the meat with seasonings, opened my cans of tomatoes and beans, diced my onion, dumped it all in the crockpot and gave it a stir. I started to put it on high so I could eat it sooner, but decided there was no rush, and moved the dial to low. The time was straight up 12:00. The sun was in and out much of the afternoon. I had windows open all over the house, so I wasn’t surprised the chili…

WordPress also gives me a daily writing prompt; I almost forgot. Today’s is: “What was your favorite subject in school?” Well, I’ll tell you what it wasn’t. Math. No surprise there. The people who are skilled with the words aren’t usually blessed with a head for numbers. I’m not sure which is more useful, although I try not to judge people too harshly for spelling and grammar, since my math skills aren’t on display. I remember all my math teachers would say, “you aren’t going to be able to go around with a calculator in your pocket your whole life!” Ha. Showed you. Funny, one of my closest and dearest friends is the daughter-in-law of my most hated teacher, one Mrs. Gwen Hardin. She was a pill and a hag. Everybody hated her. Angela even found hate mail from parents when she was cleaning out the house. That, and a lifetime supply of aluminum foil, among other things. This summer they cleaned out one of the sheds and there was like, an entire warehouse of medical supplies: wheelchairs, crutches, potty stools, you name it. Although I can’t talk, I never threw out my crutches. And good thing, since I had to use them this summer. Anyway. I liked English very well by the time I got to high school. Don’t tell anybody, but I loved essay questions and I didn’t mind the research papers. I most especially loved…

Writing prompt for today is pin cushion. Two words, like that. I always thought it was one. I guess if you’ve ever seen an allergist, you’ve felt like a pin cushion. Don’t they jab and scrape you with little needles? I don’t know; I’ve never been. I’ve often felt like I needed to. I tell you, though, my doctor sure don’t care to draw blood. And I don’t give it up easily; they always have trouble hitting a vein. So they make a pincushion out of me. They feel bad about it, though, so that helps. And I make them nervous because I tend to pass out if they talk about how my veins roll or hide or any number of circus tricks. I swear I drink all the water for twelve hours before, and no alcohol. I’m just a crappy veins person. But once they hit it, I’m a free bleeder. One of my doctors told me once that was because of my Irish heritage. I’m sitting on my porch, feeling every inch my age, with my glass of red and my Nora Roberts book. Oh well. I am who I am. I rarely read Nora Roberts…this is Dark Witch; I checked it out for Halloween. It’s set in Ireland so it appealed to me. It feels so late! But it would still only be 8:00 on “old” time…

So much for getting home on time. As they say, what goes up, must come down. It was the tearing down of what I put up Saturday and Sunday. And it was even hotter today than it was then. It’s ridiculous to be sweating that much at 6:00 on November 7th. But here we are. I’ve been scrolling writing prompts, because I am bored to tears with journaling. It ain’t like I’ve got some big exciting life to write about. It’s more about staying in the habit, and since I spend the majority of my time alone, I’m all I’ve got to write about, hahahaha. Or my disgusting coworker and I don’t want to relive a moment of being in his midst. So in my searching for something new, I discovered it’s National Novel Writing Month (or as they call it online NaNoWriMo. I thought I had stumbled on some Japanese). If only I were the type of person that could write with a plot in mind, and come up with some twists and conflicts. I am not that sort of writer. It’s also Aviation Month, so I guess I could tell about my various flights (not all of fancy), or the time I tried to take Lightning Bug to the Wright Brothers Museum in Outer Banks. Or about where I’d fly to if I had my…

Sure is good to be seein’ red again. I felt a weight that I didn’t know I had been carrying fall off me this morning as I read of the good news. It’s so funny, the headlines on major news sources. They sure don’t waste much time pointing out that he’s a convicted felon, or any other number of half truths. It makes me sick, and why I don’t read or watch the news. You never know what you can believe. Facebook is zero fun today, as well. Both sides are showing their ugly faces and I just had to disconnect.Everybody knows my pick, anyway: Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes.And my dog. So I’d been in high spirits all morning, then I got a Facebook notification as a reminder to check my memories. I did so, and there it was, my favorite person in the world has been gone for three years. I knew it, I’ve been preparing for this day for a couple of weeks now, but with the excitement from the election, it escaped my foremost thoughts. So I had to sit here and cry a minute, as I remembered.But all hope is not lost. I had him for a long time. I soaked up his wise words, and his sometimes hurtful ones as well. He just tried to make me tough. And I guess it worked. I cry over…