It has been a very long day.

I tried to pace myself, and start strong with coffee and breakfast. I usually treat myself to Bojangles after the doctor, but I’d be treating myself to some dirty martinis later, so I figured I could make my breakfast.

I get to the dermatologist and the waiting room was PACKED. It was only nine in the morning; I think they start seeing patients at 7:30, so this was surprising. The guy sitting next to me was reading a Bible. He was about my age. I hope he was ok. Or maybe he was the driver of someone and he was in the word for them. I commented on it to my doctor and she speculated maybe he just liked reading the Bible. “As we all should,” I acceded.

Surprisingly, I like my new doctor better than my old one. This one may not look as carefully, but she still found plenty to freeze and cut on. “Plenty” being three spots total, but that’s enough. And what I really liked about her was her easygoing demeanor and ability to smile. Amy was very serious. When this one said, “your chest looks good,” I replied, “that’s what all the boys tell me.”
I thought her and the nurse both were gonna fall out.
I have to wait two weeks to know the results of what my previous doctor called “a bug bite that didn’t heal correctly”. I’m sticking with that diagnosis in the meantime. I got enough to occupy my mind without worrying I’ve got skin cancer.

It was a busy day at work. Addison came up and stayed on the phone nearly the whole entire day. If he wasn’t on the phone, he was on a Teams meeting. I’ve never had to contend with so much racket at this office. It was relentless. And above that, endless crunching and sniffing from JRN that I still haven’t become accustomed to after a year of it. It makes the day go by much faster having Addison in house but wow it’s a lot when it’s typically so quiet.

Board tonight, with Christmas Party thrown in. My friend Wayne baked us a cake (at Kent’s request) and brought it by. This is a very sweet gesture from anyone, but most especially from this gentleman who is tighter than bark on a tree and also a bit of a curmudgeon. “Bit” being a sorely understated term.
Since the meeting didn’t start till six, there was no place to go but the bar and sling back a few martinis in the meantime. I met a very nice gentleman who originally hailed from Indiana that is rooting for Tennessee and also Indiana, because he said he wasn’t smart enough or wealthy enough to attend Notre Dame, and they needed beat for a change.
I agreed wholeheartedly.
He was eating a wedge salad and I remarked he was a cheap date, which thrilled him to no end. Jake had came down to our end at one point and the dude had offered to scoot down and I told him quickly it wasn’t necessary; I see snotty Jake all day every day. Just before he left he asked me if Jake gave me trouble, he was under the impression I didn’t like him very much. I laughed and said not that kind of trouble, and I appreciated him saving me from the germs.
He was very curious about who my crowd was, and I told him, in a nutshell, about how we help farmers. He smiled and said that was wonderful. I asked him if he was a farmer and he outright laughed. “I’m no farmer,” he admitted.
I twinkled back at him. “I know you’re not. I know every farmer in this county!”
And then it was time to eat and make merry. It was a small group this year, which made me a little sad. But Addison had a sick baby, and David was with Jaimie at her party for her work (at the Sunsphere! How exciting!), we had one missing, and two wives who had other commitments. Of course JRN had hastened to bring a date, who smiled a lot but didn’t speak except when spoken to. I was okay with that, but if you’re gonna get a word in edgewise around the rest of us, you’re gonna have to fight for it 😁 Sam came, and seemed to be in a big way, and I was pleased to see Athen was getting around better than expected.
My shoes were too big, and I had put those little grippy things in the backs to help, but they didn’t help enough. I tripped my way back from the bathroom.
We got a blessing at the end of the meal, even though we forgot to bless the beginning. I’m blaming David, since he’s the one I always ask. I don’t know that any of the rest of us would have been comfortable praying out loud. I missed it, though.

I wasn’t quite home when the news came of a distant acquaintance’s passing. I’m friends with his twin brother on Facebook, and I vaguely remember waiting on them at Co-op many years ago before they moved away. This is a type of hurt I’ll never know, and can only imagine the trauma. I would say they were closer than any best friend or sibling you could ever have, just going from what I could see on Facebook with their constant ribbing. My breath caught as I imagined the days ahead for the remaining brother. I truly cannot even begin to think about how lost he must feel. Once again, we don’t have to look far to find people with bigger problems than our own.

In this book I’m working on the author writes about the differences of people who survive, which is an enormous thing, but also the people who are warriors. The ones who didn’t take cover in the ditch when the fighting was imminent. The ones who suited up and rode. The ones who fought for the ones that were cowering behind closed doors. And maybe that’s all they had; maybe that’s all they were mentally equipped for. And that’s ok. Not everybody is a warrior. I am so tired. But I tell myself, “you are not merely a survivor. You are a warrior.” And I smile. I’m out here in the world, facing whatever comes my way. I have yet to run. I don’t know how much more fight I have in me, but if I’m called to do so, know that I will until my dying breath. Survivors can trudge along behind the ones who fought. Survivors can get in line. Warriors lead. Warriors stand.
And warriors cry when nobody watches.

Love from Appalachia,
~Amy