That title just looks weird.
But it’s kinda like what I said about the fires here, you can find blessings wherever you look. That year I saw generosity and a community with a big heart and open doors. Through my divorce, I found friends that pull you close and guard your heart and will pray for you when you’re unable to pray for yourself. So I’m sure I won’t have any trouble coming up with a list of things for this year.

I had to do some shopping today during my lunch break and unfortunately, it was raining. Rain is just an inconvenience, but you can’t help but dread going out in it. I don’t like my feet wet (even though I was wearing boots), and I had straightened my hair. And it got me to thinking.

Four years ago we were all praying VERY FERVENTLY for rain. It couldn’t get here quick enough, and it couldn’t rain hard enough. This was during the Gatlinburg Fires, the very thing that kick started me into opening this blog. Rain would have helped immensely back then, and it did come, but it was just about too little, too late. Shame on me for seeing it as an aggravation today. Think of all the states and countries in perpetual drought. And here I was complaining. Rain is a good thing!
Yes, I had straightened my hair. Well, so what? Who am I trying to impress, for one? And at least I have hair to straighten! And at least I can get it to straighten. And again, there are plenty of stick-straight haired people who would kill for curly hair, frizzies or not. Shame on me for being vain.
While I was on this kick, I should be grateful I wasn’t walking or riding the bus while I was out getting groceries. I had my very own warm car with a spacious trunk to put them into. (As soon as I move this chair, and this bucket, and these empty growlers, and these books….)
Thank the good Lord that I had the means to buy groceries, rain notwithstanding. Some people would give their eye teeth to have 36 eggs and orange juice and a box of Little Debbies in their possession. (I am one of those people. I actually did not buy ANY snack cakes today. I made a vow to lay off the Zingers and to only consume one box of Christmas Tree Cakes this holiday season. It seemed doable in November.)
And yes, to avoid all this Southern Baptist guilt in my head, I could have simply avoided going in the rain. I could have gone another day in the sunshine. Legend holds that we WILL indeed see the sun again! Ha. But I didn’t want to have to leave my dog. His presence would NOT be appreciated in the grocery store.

As for the rest of my thankfuls…

I’ll start, as I always should, with my belief in MY Saviour, Jesus Christ. What a merciful God we serve. I don’t serve him enough, but I know He’s responsible for me getting home safely and having a roof over my head, and having a strong network of friends and family. For all blessings, I give Him credit. Sure, I worked for my possessions, but I wouldn’t be able to work if it wasn’t for my health. And I really don’t deserve to be as healthy as I am. I eat everything. I refuse to sweat.

I am thankful for my little house. I really do love it. And I’m thankful I was able to find a roofer who showed up and got the job done when he said he would. I’m thankful for my gutter guy, Joe, and that he had kind things to say about my daddy. That was unexpected and appreciated. I’ll tell that story someday. I am also thankful for the invention of gutter guards, as they have eliminated severe anxiety and stress for me at least twice a year. I HATE climbing on my roof. I am thankful I had new windows installed a few years ago and I’m thankful for the fence my Grandmother had installed many years ago. Chester is thankful for that, too.

I’m thankful for my best friend (who probably won’t even read this). We don’t always see eye to eye and sometimes I have to be like, “Hey. I need you to listen to this and give me your opinion.” Because she’s so busy but I know I can shuck down to the cob and we are BRUTALLY honest with each other, always. I’m so glad we’ve been able to spend some time together the last couple of years now that I don’t have a husband to worry about, and her kids are finally capable of being left semi-unsupervised. Not everybody has a person that they can call for any reason, that knows all their secrets, and is almost 100% of the time on their side. She is the closest thing to a sister I will ever have and I appreciate her and her generous and sweet husband so, so much.

I’m thankful for my Co-op family. They know me as well as anybody. I forged so many friendships there that have carried me through the rest of my life, as well as working relationships with people I see on a professional basis. It’s so weird how Co-op saw me through the final months of my college time to today, still working with them in many aspects of my life. I’m thankful for the Co-op, too.

I’m grateful to friends who are better to me than I am to them. Looking at you Angela, Lorie, and Donna! Just to name a FEW. Y’all always have my back, whether it’s a Facebook Karen or having me a horse saddled or some treats to pick up on my way home. You don’t go unappreciated, but sometimes I’m so ashamed that I’ll never live up to your tier of friendship. These are the gals who would come, no questions asked, shovels and backhoes at the ready. One even has a wood chipper.

I am thankful that Chester has never had heartworms. I hope that this will equate to a good long life.

I am thankful for choices. Every day we make a million choices without even realizing it. As a woman, I am more aware of the things I have a choice of doing. The Centennial of a woman’s right to vote was this year. Imagine! Only a hundred years have we had any say! Blows my mind. I am able to work at any job I want, not merely a teacher or nurse, but a welder, a meteorologist, a fisherman, or lawyer! The possibilities are endless! I can do any of these things! I can wear pants and I can drive my own car wherever I want to, alone, after dark. I don’t have to have a male escort me on vacation or out to dinner (I can’t tell you how thankful I am for that!) I have a choice about whether I wish to have a child (I’m talking contraceptives, here, people, don’t get excited) and I can walk right up, stick my hand out, and introduce myself to anybody I darn well please. I don’t have to wait on my (nonexistent) husband to do it for me. I can buy a cell phone, a car, my own house BY MYSELF.

I am thankful that I haven’t always been given what I’ve thought I wanted. Now, I’m not talking about a mink coat or something like that. I’m talking about respecting God’s time. There was another job that I prayed and prayed that I would get. Turns out, I didn’t want it at all. I wanted THIS job. I have prayed for certain men to ask me out…to find out later they weren’t suited for me at all. I prayed for that pit bull in Charlotte to be mine. Thank God the agency finally decided to be transparent about his issues and he didn’t work out. I’ve prayed for a book deal to fall into my lap, and for some reason that hasn’t transpired, either. I’m sure there is a good reason for it. So I’m just going my own way. I’m not waiting, per se, but I’m trying not to think about it too hard. If it’s supposed to happen, it will happen.
I made new friends. I said goodbye and good riddance to others.
I swam in a warm lake, a rough ocean, a placid Sound, and played beer pong in a pool. I had a kiss or two and drank some weird beers with some strange and familiar people. I read some excellent books–shoutout to the one I just finished, The Starless Sea by Erin Morgenstern. If you’ve ever wondered about adult fairy tales, I would definitely recommend that one. I’ve eaten some wonderful fattening food- some of it lovingly prepared by people precious and dear to me. I have had soul-searching conversations and thousands of laughs with so many of you, despite restrictions and opinions. I did what I wanted to for the most part, and I hope you chose to, too.
We wound this year out with the Bethlehem Star and a white Christmas, and finally a beautiful full moon. I hope you got outside to look at them all. They were gifts from above.

So 2020 is over, but the rest of our lives are in front of us. I don’t blame the year, I thank the year. Maybe it got some people to slow down and reflect. Maybe we all reaccessed what is important to us, what we can live without. We all made choices on how to live this year. And if you’re reading this, you made choices that kept you alive. So congratulations. Maybe it wasn’t the year we envisioned- when are they??? But it wasn’t the end of the world after all. My greatest loss was my sweet little brindle bulldog, Lightning Bug. My greatest happiness has his big blocky head in my lap. Who rescued who?

To another tomorrow. For tomorrow is another day.

Love from Appalachia,

Amy